Live, and have no regrets

Months ago I wrote about losing my dear animal friend. How fast time goes by. There are days, when I’m too busy keeping my head up with studying and work, when I don’t think about him. But on other days, like today, he keeps coming into my mind. How much I miss him, the simple things, like running together through the bushes, his happy barks, his intelligent sparkling eyes.

Losing a loved one, whether it’s a person or an animal, is hard. And for everyone the grieving process is different. This is something important to remember, something that is often overlooked, but has to be respected.

So what I have learnt, felt, and thought, is subjective, it’s my story. But it is about something that unites all of us; life, and death. Without death, we wouldn’t be able to rejoice life. Without death, we wouldn’t be alive. Life and death are both antagonistic and complementary, both being part of our reality. Some might not like those ideas, but to me there is a certain beauty in this, in the essence of our existence. One of the lessons learnt from losing a loved one might thus be:

Live. Live every day, and make sure that when you look behind, you have no regrets. Live and be happy, grateful, that you may share your life with others. Our loved ones might leave us one day, but every single day by their side is precious, a blessing, and a reason to be happy. Death is inevitable, and I’m not subestimating the devastation it can bring to a persons life. But I am saying that we should all live more, in the here and now, and enjoy our lives and that of others.

And even when our loved ones are gone, they can still be an inspiration for wisdom and insights. From Casper, my animal friend, I learnt after his death to never, ever, undervalue life. Don’t throw it away, don’t get lost in unimportant matters. Live. Be. Love.  Yes, he was a dog, and not all people can imagine that a dog has been so important to me, but he has inspired me. He was a living being who with all his soul lived truly and freely. He showed me, with his death, to not waste my life.

To me, losing someone you love should make you value life more, not forsake it, throw it away, ignore it. Yes, I understand mourning, I understand grief, but at some point you have to embrace all the good. All those beautiful memories together, all the love and friendship. Don’t let grief shut out all those good things.

I’m still sad. Some days more than others. But that’s part of life. Even sadness should be seen as something good, although often people think it’s bad… Being sad about losing my dear animal friend means I’m alive, it means I cared about him. It means that whatever friendship we had, it was deep, strong, beautiful. A friendship between two species, that to me was so natural that I never once questioned it.

And what happens after death? I do not know the answers to that great mystery. All I know is that flowers now emerge from his beautiful last resting place, and that his soul roams freely, ever happy, loving and full of enthusiasm.

After all, death is just the next great adventure.